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--Under construction forever--

Monday, August 1, 2022

Remind me to never be so flippant about the internet and creating accounts again. I want out. I'm sifting through years of old email crap and passwords and photos and documents I haven't seen or thought about for years but I can't just delete everything because I'm too sentimental. And I can't do anything impulsive because I've told myself not to, because I knew I would try to. In similar circumstances I've just erased the lot in one fell swoop and always come to regret it. I was too lazy to reckon with everything I've amassed, but so at risk of deleting as an escape. The rush of "decluttering" is always temporary, and something I've fallen for countless times. I don't want to have to give an email, password, home address and phone number to buy a pizza. And I don't want to have to keep uploading my little images. I don't like the format. I don't want to resist the future. But I know what feels wrong in my soul. I feel like this can't wait. I'm going to sift, and then I'm going to unimpulsively change things, I'm not going to feel a rush and I'm going to feel the same and be faced with the same reality, and I'm not going to attempt another escape. The monkey doesn't care where he leaves his fruit skins and poo and footprints and broken twigs, he just keeps going and the decomposers clean up after him and nourish themselves. Even a thought or a conversation is cleaned up by lost memory. But this kind of detritus doesn't get decomposed, it needs to be manually destroyed to be truly gone. I'm just realising this is the "digital footprint" people talk about. I can't get to the end of this thought so that's all for now.
Tuesday, July 12, 2022

I'm updating the site so I'm checking in here. Birthday was one for the record books, I feel so blessed. I've been wanting to put out this song in July but I haven't been able to think of good lyrics until now, I finally got them over the last 2 days. It seems like usually everything I'm proud of that I do I just have to wait for. My gut reaction against things is getting stronger and stronger and vice versa, which is awesome. I'm feeling really connected at the moment. I'm starting the biz up and I love the first product I've designed, getting the logistical aspects together has been horrifying but I think I've done it now. The frog is still outside, but when it's really cold he doesn't croak at all and I always get scared he won't come back. It's been so busy this year and it seems like people are starting to feel the crunch a bit, I'm surprised that I've managed to stay relatively normal.
Friday, June 3, 2022

I was one day off with my last announcement about Water Tiger year, oops. We know have one Striped Marsh Frog permanently living in our garden, he croaks all night long and sometimes you hear him during the day. He has been here for months and he just keeps croaking. I love it, i think it's so adorable. Recently, after months of being on his own, we heard at least two more of his kind croaking for two nights in his garden spot. They seem to have gone but I hope they come back, I hope they're okay. There's a cat that runs around here at night. I wonder where they go. Having them there makes me so happy. I've decided to try make an album instead of an EP this year, I have enough songs and I want to do them all justice by putting them out together. I also don't want to come back to old songs when I start making the next album, which I have a very concrete idea of and 9 demoes for already. We're doing a show in July, I'm also formally launching my creative enterprise in July. My bday is in July. My bro is visiting in July! I hope it goes well. Such an exciting year ahead!!
Wednesday, February 2, 2022

Year of the Water Tiger starts today. Yesterday we went swimming at this local spot and as we got to the water a storm rolled in, banging and growling. I thought it sounded like the spirit of the tiger announcing its arrival. The lightning was flickering in the forest and I started freaking out thinking we were going to be struck by a giant bolt, but I let go of the fear, thinking about the courage and rebellion of the tiger, and got to enjoy the experience of swimming in a storm with just people I love. It passed with a blue sky rolling back over us and summer sun beaming down making everything sparkle and all the colours around us look so vivid. I couldn't believe how lucky we were to have those couple of hours turn out so well. Today there was another storm and we played in the heavy rain, the lucky feeling keeps growing. I also feel my mindstate shifting to allow more of the tiger to grow 🐅 🐾

Thursday, January 27, 2022

How has it already been two weeks since my last post here? It's going to be another fast year isn't it -_- This morning I "set an intention" that today I would do something I've been putting off, I haven't done it yet but I hope when I do it I keep it doing more of it because I put x10 more stuff off than I put on. Like when I said in my last post that I thought she was ready to launch...she was ready, it was me that wasn't ready - not ready to do something concrete

Thursday, January 13, 2022

I got the day off work today, I think she's ready to launch

Sunday, December 19, 2021

This is my first entry to the homepage. Welcome